The joy of getting packages in the mail certainly does not diminish with age. Even at 30, I’m excited like a little kid waiting for his mail away secret decoder ring when I come home from work and see a large box sitting on my doorstep.
In recent years, startups and larger companies have been harnessing the power of the postal service and creating services where boxes of clothing, toiletries, toys, games, puzzles, food, and limitless other goods can be delivered to your doorstep for a recurring fee.
The Nick Box is another awesome subscription-based package delivery service that provides a cornucopia of random items related to 90s Nickelodeon. Retro Nickelodeon culture is like a religion to me, so I absolutely had to have this.
It runs quarterly and costs $49.99 a box (plus S&H) or $45.99 a box (plus S&H) if you pre-pay the year. It’s a small price to pay for nostalgia like this, so I was salivating as soon as I caught wind of it.
This week, the service finally launched in full and I received my first box in the mail. I was so overcome with joy that I immediately took everything out of its packaging and started playing with it like a child on Christmas morning. Now that I’ve had a few days to be near my newly prized possessions, I figured it was time to share them with the world and let you know my opinion of the set.
The first thing to note about this box is the packaging itself. Covered in 90s Nickelodeon cartoon characters and the familiar Nickelodeon logo, I could probably just frame this thing by itself and hang it on the wall and I’d be happy. Within, however, even more treasures would await.
Spunky Plush Doll
Rocko’s Modern Life was a somewhat under-rated show. It felt like a more family-friendly version of Ren & Stimpy, but it had its own unique world and characters.
Spunky, Rocko’s dog, was one of those likable characters. He’s best known for dragging his ass across the carpet and eating large green things lurking in Rocko’s garbage.
He’s dumb, he’s lovable, and he’s an excellent addition to my stuffed animal collection.
Angelica is everyone’s favorite spoiled, bitchy little girl who picked on babies for a living and whined about everything. The only thing that made her happy, though, was her nearly-hairless doll, Cynthia.
I really love the packaging here and it’s excellent for display purposes. It’s one of the only times in my life I’ll feel comfortable showing off a doll intended for little girls on my office book shelf.
Reptar was Tommy Pickles’ Godzilla-inspired personal hero and made an appearance in lots of episodes of Rugrats. The most memorable such appearance is when the babies are trapped in the toy store and a large, animatronic Reptar doll saves their lives while incessantly repeating “Halt! I am Reptar!”
It’s small and vinyl and beautiful, but I wish it came with a Reptar bar for dessert.
Chuckie Finster Cosplay Gear
Who could forget the red-haired, wimpy kid with the big, goofy glasses and the planet on his shirt? Chuckie Finster is unforgettable and dressing like him is a treat I didn’t think I’d ever be able to fulfill.
The shirt is awesome and fits well and the glasses are a fun novelty costume accessory. Honestly, the part of this item that makes me happiest is the little sticker that reads “Official Chuckie Cosplay Gear.”
Catdog USB Flash Drive
While, admittedly, Catdog was at the tail end of my Nickelodeon-watching days, I still appreciated it as a show and this USB drive is quite fetching.
Normally, there seems to be a media bias toward dogs over cats, but this USB drive is breaking down barriers by letting Cat house the USB internals and dog is relegates to a simple dust cover. How progressive.
Iron-On Patches always remind me of my high school days when I would load up on these things at Hot Topic. I had everything from the Misfits and Marilyn Manson to Scooby Doo and Underdog. Anything that could adorn my backpack and also give me pop culture street cred at the same time was worth buying.
These iron-on patches include some really memorable characters. My personal favorites (in order) are: Krum, Ren & Stimpy, Rocko, and Arnold. Would it be weird to plaster these all over my work clothes?
Everyone needs a package of blank greeting cards lying around their house in case of a forgotten birthday or anniversary, so these would fit that bill nicely.
The problem is I would never want to give any of these away. I want them scattered around my desk or hanging on my walls or buried with me.
Arriving in a cute, lacy drawstring bag, these rubber Rugrats character coasters are a great addition to my living room coffee table.
The characters included are: Angelica, Tommy, Chuckie, Phil, and Lil. I think it’s kind of racist that they didn’t include Susie. I was really hoping Grandpa Pickles would make his way in there too.
My absolute favorite part of this box has to be the Stimpy mug. I may be biased because I’m obsessed with unique coffee mugs, but I’ve already dubbed it “King of the Mugs” in my cabinet. This title holds considerable weight around our apartment.
While other mugs may be filled with milk, tea, broth, or cold drinks, Stimpy is only for coffee. He’ll only have the finest arabica touching his glazed inner lining and he’ll have the privilege of being cleaned semi-weekly instead of just weekly. It’s a true honor.
Also, it’s Stimpy. I fucking love Stimpy. I still have a farting Stimpy doll from the 90s sitting on my computer tower. There’s nothing not to love.
For $50, the Nick Box is worth every penny. These toys and clothes and trinkets make me happy every time I look at them. It’s the kind of nostalgia that’s both relaxing and uplifting. It fills me with euphoria.
The only minor complaint I have is that the first Nick Box is a tad bit Rugrats-heavy. Don’t get me wrong, I love Rugrats dearly, but I’d love to see a little more Ah! Real Monsters, Doug, and Hey Arnold! represented. Next time, fellas.
I highly recommend, if you’re anywhere near as obsessed as I am with this kind of shit, that you subscribe as soon as possible. 3 months can’t pass by soon enough.
I leave you with my best bald, bearded Chuckie Finster impression: